Vodafone knocks British Airways off the top slot

by Admin 25. February 2014 13:34

And British Telecom sneaks into second place.

What am I talking about? Why my Sh1t list of course! Let's start with BA, who at least got me to New York, then from there to San Francisco and then home again; all without undue delays (there was a three hour delay at JFK but I’m prepared to overlook that. I’m still slightly frustrated that I have two write to them then they email me back asking for more information and I again have to respond by pulping a tree to make paper before sending a snail mail message to them, only to repeat the cycle apparently forever. They have suggested Fax to speed up the process but A. I can’t get back to 1985 to find a fax machine and B. British Telecom have conspired to make that impossible…

So, second place is BT who have managed to fail to fix my phones for almost two weeks and still can’t give me a certain date by which it will be done. And yes, phones plural, I have two separate lines, one two separate exchanges coming into my home on two separate telegraph lines (see other posts for details of my DR challenges), and they have managed to have both out at the same time.

But I can forgive them for that; the storms have damaged a lot of infrastructure. Pretty poor that they haven’t managed to sort it after all this time, but still, understandable when you are used to their normal levels of poor service.

Vodafone however have achieved new levels of mediocrity. Do let me share… Whist travelling in the US my phone stopped working. Tricky to arrange taxi’s, know which meeting I’m supposed to be at, keep in touch with ones family and little stuff like that… I could phone no one, not even Vodafone themselves to find out what the problem was. I assumed it was some sort of roaming issues but when I got back at the weekend the problem persisted. Still I couldn’t call Vodafone (not even from home thanks to BT). So I dragged myself into town to find a Vodafone shop. They at least provided a phone to call the billing department. No, you can’t just dial them, you have to first go theorugh the typical dreadful automated phone management system, be misdirected several times, speak to someone on another continent who doesn’t understand what it is your problem is etc. but finally I got through to billing. And what did they tell me…

My service has been suspended! Well I know that but why? It seems I have spent too much. I pointed out that I’m on a contract and that they have a direct debit arrangement with me and I really couldn’t see what the issue was. Apparently it was all for my good. Though I have to say that it didn’t feel like it at the time! A manager was duly fetched, apparently to make a bad situation much worse (he was great at that). He explained again that this was for my own good and I asked him how that could be given the problems it caused me whilst travelling. He said that Vodafone had no way of knowing that I was travelling so I had to explain to him how roaming and peer arrangements work so that it could understand that they knew exactly where I was, which is more than could be said for my long suffering wife.

Then I made my big mistake: I mentioned that this had been a problem because it had affected my work. “It’s illegal to make business calls”, he explained “It’s a personal phone; they could cut off service for that alone…” I was forced to use all my powers of self restrain not to explain what an idiot he was but instead I explained that I did make business calls on my phone on a regular basis and if they intended cutting of my phone then they should get on with it so that I could go to a decent phone company as soon as possible.

The call dragged on as the idiot at Vodafone made a series of statements which he then denied making almost before he had finished making them. It was at this point that I asked if the call was recorded for training purposes and to my delight it was. I’m now in the process of requesting a copy of that recording under the data protection act:- if only to amuse myself and my friends if for no other reason.

It is good to know that such gargantuan efforts to piss ones customers off are still employed by some companies. I worry sometimes that we will become a nation of bland average performance but Vodafone has gone above and beyond the call of duty when it comes to being rubbish. They stand head and shoulders above the others and for that they have reached the top slot on my sh1t list where they shall undoubtedly remain until such time that I can remove myself and my entire family from the ranks of their poor suffering customers.

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Comments (1) -

3/23/2014 11:46:53 AM #

"I worry sometimes that we will become a nation of bland average performance..."

I fear we reached that state many years ago.

Just reading your woes made me angry. You must've been fuming. "It's illegal to make business calls" - loved that little nugget, brilliant!


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